Deep Frying

Amidst the insanely large group of freshman who arrived this weekend were scattered the few additional international students who didn’t need the three week September course. One of these girls is from Georgia, and is one of the most gorgeous people here.

“Did y’all notice how they don’t have any real fried food here? I miss having some deep-fried chicken or vegetables.”

Deep-fried vegetables, I think to myself.

“Maybe,” I suggest, “that’s why there aren’t any fat people here.” (Which is true—there are approximately zero fat people in England).

“No!” She protests, “some people just have fat genes!”

Amazingly, those genes seem to have developed entirely independently in those former Europeans who’ve decided to live in America.

Ps. They eat so fucking well here. You know all those food-restrictions that the EU keeps getting fined for by the WTO? Guess what? They keep people healthy here!